Archive for May 2013
Dennis: well i was thinking.. we could also get cardboard cutout of ourselves…
me: hahahahah
Dennis: that would be funny housewarming gifts..
if we mailed cutout of ourselves…
and like we go and visit them and it’s clear they’ve taken yours to the shooting range…
me: hahaa
i’m all shot in the penis
Dennis: and aimed for your tiny dick..
SHHAHA
YEA
me: since it’s the smallest target
Dennis: can you imagine…
Dennis: you killing my parents..
me: OMG. i don’t even want to think about that
Dennis: just becuae you were trying to show off your pepperoni nipples to the cops…
me: hahahaahah calling them doctor officers.
Dennis: but like somehow you survive..
despite the fact that you were standing out of the sunroof… steering with your dick…
Dennis: that’s so terrible..stay away from my parents..
me: i think i said this before…
i want people to remember my wedding as more of a party than a wedding
Dennis: “i just farted”
oh that…
me: “man, angela’s party was really fun”
Dennis: ahha so like no one gets you any gifts…
me: hahahaha, j lo’s “on the floow” just started playing…
“angela got married?”
Dennis: “who’s angela?”
me: “is that why simon was crying?”
Dennis: “at home, becuase angela forgot to invite him”
Sent at 1:10 PM on Monday
me: “but it was a good party though”
Sent at 1:11 PM on Monday
Dennis: “where are we?”
“how do we get home?”
“what year is it ?”
Sent at 1:12 PM on Monday
me: “i must have seen angela’s butthole like five times”
Sent at 1:14 PM on Monday
me: this converstaion makes me feel like my wedding already happened.
Dennis: haha
just because people have seen your butthole, you think that you are married..
well news flash… you have been married, like so MANY TIMES..